Khushi looked at Arnav standing by the counter while she waited for him at the table. He stood there, waiting for their order. She knew there were a lot of girls around, stealing looks at him. Not that she blamed them; he was delicious to look at but the fire of jealousy kept on looking at things in a logical manner. Why was he not coming back to the table? It wasn’t as if it was required to stand there until the guy brought them the ordered drinks.
She saw a group of girls looking at him as they ordered their own drinks and giggling. One of them smiled and fluttered her eyelashes at him. Khushi looked on at Arnav in boiling rage to see that he had coolly looked away with disinterest from the girl who had made eyes at him. It was a bit of shock for her. She looked at him with her mouth hanging open. Arnav Singh Raizada didn’t do that!
It was as if this was another unplanned proof to show her that he was indeed a changed man. Arnav Singh Raizada as she had known him from the past would have smirked at the girl and probably raised his eyebrows at her interest. That was what used to do the girls in. She had remembered the jealous rage that had over taken her when he had done that in Goa.
The breeze was cool when Khushi, wrapped in her dressing gown decided to curl up and sit by the window in her bedroom. As she stared at the sea waves rising out of the dark sea, she took a deep breath of salty sea air. She was restless and awake in the middle of the night with no real idea of why she was awake. She thought back to the evening they had spent together.
Arnav had taken her to his known restaurant, where he was greeted like an old friend. It had surprised Khushi to see Arnav talking so affably with the owner of a small place. Arnav was a billionaire and treated everyone around him with contempt was pally with a restaurateur in Goa? Had someone told her this a few weeks back, Khushi would have laughed at them. Uptight Arnav Singh Raizada letting his so-short-hair down was something that she had never imagined. But he had and she had seen it. He had been witty, nice and considerate. She had had more glasses of wine than she normally did, had eaten food with gusto and participated in lively flirting with Arnav. It had all felt magical. All she could think about then had been Arnav. She had come to a realization this evening that their attraction, at least for her was way beyond superficial or only sexual. She was in love with him, an in a big way!
She remembered the time in the office when he had been mad at her for being so immersed in work that she had dressed shabbily for the party and he had mocked her. Later she had hardly been able to breathe with him so close to her while dancing, her head feeling as if it was filled with cotton wool and she could only stare at his tie, not looking in his eyes. He had put his hand under her chin, making her look up and she had gasped at the intensity of desire she had seen in his eyes. His hands had tightened around her waist and he had puller her even closer, with her breasts brushing his chest.
Slowly, he had maneuvered them into a dark corner of the room, both of them breathing hard. He had put her against the wall, holding he hands up and kissed her slowly at first and then deeply. He had drugged her with his kisses, his mouth making love to hers, curling her toes in her high heeled sandals. He had smelled so male, the subtle scent of his aftershave on his skin weaving its magic on her. His hands had inched their way down, caressing her breasts through the taut material and touching the low cut bodice of her party dress, his mouth on her throat. All the while he spoke about how he had been slowly going crazy all evening, wanting her. Coming back to her mouth, he kissed her again, taking full control while his hands gently took her breast out of the low cut neck. He flicked the tip of her nipple with his finger and Khushi moaned in his mouth.
He had kept on taking her name as his mouth moved down towards her breast, taking the taut nipple into his mouth while his hand had travelled down further, touching her navel, going back and grabbing her hips and then coming up front. He parted her legs and touched her there where Khushi had never been touched before. She had gasped as he continued his exploration. His mouth moved down from her breast to her navel, leaving an open mouthed kiss there. Oh my!! Thought Khushi. She was ready to fall down and it was only his strong arm around her waist that kept her standing and steady.
“Arnav, please!” She had moaned when she had felt his mouth open over her, not knowing what she was asking for but only that she wanted him to continue. He had never done that to her before. She had never before experienced such hunger, such passion in him. What shocked her was the fact that she was enjoying his ministrations, in fact she wanted him to continue. Her senses had been swimming as he placed more open mouthed kisses, the layer of clothing the only barrier between her innermost core and his mouth. She had moaned quietly, clutching his arm as he continued his exploration, down below her legs, touching his mouth on her open thighs. The dress ended just at mid-thigh.
Khushi had felt herself melting in his arms that evening. She had forgotten everything and kissed him back; forgetting where they were, until a giggle had broken the spell. Hastily she had pushed him away quite hard and adjusted her dress. He had kept quiet, breathing hard, not trying to touch her again. Not looking at him, she had run from him then, even when he called her name, scared of these intense feelings, not knowing that the desire he had aroused in her was not just physical attraction but something more. It was not going to die until he made her his.
She had then mistaken it only for strong physical attraction she felt for him, as he did for her. She had kept her distance and irked him after that. Never happy with him around yet never happy when he was far away, Khushi had not been able to understand until now what it was that pulled her to him. Why was it that she felt hurt when he mocked her or got angry on her? She could now relate to it as well as understand it.
Khushi sighed. Falling in love with Arnav Singh Raizada spelled disaster and she knew it quite well. It wasn’t as if she had wanted to fall in love but- he was—when he was not pretending to be a royal asshole, he was the best man she had ever known. She had fallen for that man, no doubt about it. So how was she going to get herself out of this situation?
Khushi thought about what he had said earlier that evening when he had apologized to her for his early morning behavior, “I’m always like this Khushi. I try to be nice but somehow my past comes out of me and bitterness always spills out first. I don’t know what to do but – main aisa he hoon Khushi. Tum jaanti ho mujhe, toh ye bhi samajh lo ke kabhi kabhi gusse main- I say things I don’t mean. Mere gusse ko face value par mat lena Khushi.
What we feel for each other needs to be explored. You wanted us to be together as friends this weekend but I can hardly keep my hands off you. I have only so much restraint on myself where you’re concerned Khushi. You’re like sweet sugar in my blood, giving me a high. I’ve always lived in the moment and the women have never been given any false hopes or promises. I’m no saint but I promise to be faithful to you. I think it will take us ages before we are able to put out this fire of attraction burning between us.
I know you’re not one of those women who get involved with any man she’s attracted to. I know you want a relationship for keeps. I don’t know if I feel love for you but I do know that not touching drives me crazy. I care about you, worry about you when you’re not around. I could take you right now if I wanted to-“ Khushi had gasped, outraged while her face had taken a rosy hue but he had earnestly continued,”- you know I’m being honest Khushi, and I know that you won’t be able to resist me for long–but I did promise you, I will not touch you unless you come to me first. I shall wait for you to come to me.”
“I am like this Khushi. You know me well so understand this-sometimes in anger I say things I don’t mean.” These words were what had made Khushi restless.
Too wound up, she couldn’t sit still any longer. Yesterday she’d been thinking and wondering if she’d gone crazy to have agreed to come here to Goa alone with him, without even letting Payal jiji know what was going on. For some unknown reason she hadn’t wanted to share her growing attraction and feelings for Arnav with Payal jiji or tell her about his proposal. Now she knew why she didn’t want to. She was afraid to think about it, about her future. She thought back to the rest of the evening.
They had silently strolled on the beach, near to where the waves broke up, not wanting to go back to the house just yet. The silence was not uneasy; in fact it was easy and comforting, peaceful. While crossing the street later on, he had taken her hand in his, pulling her closer. Khushi had been touched by the gesture, knowing instinctively that he wanted to protect her. They had held hands the rest of the way home. It had felt so good. It had felt like they were a normal couple, lovers who could be seen everywhere in Goa, walking hand in hand, openly affectionate.
Once they had reached back home, she had politely thanked him for the dinner and a lovely evening, kissed him gently on the cheek and quietly come to her room, her head full of his scent. She was crazy and certified for it!
The cool breeze gave her goose bumps along with her hot thoughts of Arnav. She gazed outside absently and then started. A movement had caught her attention. In the part of the terrace of the house that was visible from her window, Khushi could see someone was standing. Her heart beats picked up speed as she realized who it would be. Arnav.
She looked at him, as he gazed into the dark night, wide awake. He was barefoot, with no shirt on his body. His jeans slung low on his hips, making Khushi’s breath hitch in her throat. He was so powerfully male! His back was broad and his shoulders shone in the moonlight. Khushi felt heat throbbing in her body while her brain went on another track. Why was he awake? What was he doing out there standing alone? What was he thinking about? Was he thinking of his future or – was he thinking of their future?
Khushi didn’t realize she had been staring hard. He must have felt her gaze burning him for he turned around and looked straight at her window, to see her sitting there. Slowly he lifted his hand and waved. Khushi’s body trembled at his gaze, even from so far away. Weakly she lifted her hand and waved back. Slowly she drew back and away from the window.
Her heart was in her mouth as the beats pounded through her body. She wanted him oh so much! Without a second thought, she ran out of the room, the marble floor cool on her feet.
*Flashback continues to next chapter*
NOTE: We’re coming to the end of this FF. 😦 It’s a wrench but I must end it soon.